When you stay at home taking care of your home and family all day the evening time can be a challenge to find a routine that works for you and your family.
If you are wanting to feel like you get a break and can breathe each day and you’ve found it hard to do so because your job never truly ends since your job is your home and family. There are some things you can put in place to let yourself become present for your family and be able to recharge.
Creating routines that work for everyone in the family is so important. A good evening routine is one of the more important routines to have down because it’s typically the time that the whole family is in the home together. Making the most of that time as a family is so important.
How my evenings look as a stay-at-home wife
My evenings can look vastly different from day to day, but there are a few things that stay the same to keep the family unit running well.
This includes myself getting a break and time to recharge. I can not pour out of an empty cup. That is why it is so important for us to make sure I am getting recharged so that I can pour into my family all day, day after day the best I possibly can.
The work starts during the day
I try to get all my work done prior to my Husband getting home from work. This way once he’s home we both can relax and share the time doing things together as a family.
So my typical evening routine looks like cooking dinner as he’s driving home or a little after he arrives. We sit down and eat and catch up and then he cleans up dinner.
After that, it’s really just spending our time doing things together or things we need to do. I am not spending my time doing chores around our home, planning things (unless it’s with my Husband), or working on my Blog. These things are not my priority or done in the evening. This is the biggest rule I have for my evening.
Keeping my mind at ease
I found when I didn’t have this as my standard I’d be left feeling anxious and feeling like I needed to be doing something at all times. I was always super unsettled in the evening and felt like I couldn’t relax because I did not have any structure. This is because every job I do is really never-ending and there is always something I could technically be doing.
Having a time to clock off and relax has been so good for me and my family. I now can be fully present and relax and recharge. This is a must for me to not lead myself to burnout.
I found myself much more irritable and would stay up at night because my mind was racing. This has changed dramatically since the change.
It’s a mindset
This really is a mindset shift. Before I would spend some of my evenings already doing what I am now, but without having my work done in the evening as a rule I couldn’t fully relax feeling like I needed to be doing something. Now, I know I don’t need to be doing any of my jobs and what I really need to be doing it recharging and being present with my family. This is what is important to me and my family not jobs I am doing or keeping up with.
It honestly doesn’t always look very different from what I am doing in the day, but I take the pressure off myself and do things with my Husband. This is what I needed to relax and let myself let go of things mentally.
Not working in the evening sometimes means having to work harder during the day to get everything done. It’s not always fun, but knowing I’ll get a true break in the evening is definitely a huge push for me to complete all that I can throughout the day. This also means sometimes I have to wait till the next day to complete a task. At the beginning this made me uncomfortable, but now that I have seen how important and needed the break is I have found it easier to relax.
Before bed
Once we are ready to head up to bed for the night we begin our closing shift to set up our next day up for success. A quick pick up and we’re done. The home is tidied up for the next day. If you want to read about making a closing shift for your house click here.
My evening routine as a stay-at-home wife is simple
That’s it. I keep my evenings simple and open for any of me and my family’s needs or wants. I get to enjoy the evenings being as present as I possibly can be and I wouldn’t change that for the world. Even as seasons change I have adjusted my daily routine so that I am able to continue to do so. This is not only important for me so that I can have quality time with my family, but also let myself relax and recharge.
What’s your ideal evening routine as a stay-at-home wife
You’re ideal evening routine may be entirely than mine and that’s beautiful! This is what I found after trial and error to be best for me. I encourage you to keep trying until you find a rhythm that works best for you and your family in the evening. Figuring out what you want to prioritize to make the most of the time.
Ideas of ways to include different things
There are seasons where I want to consistently include certain things in to my evenings and I have found it hard to balance including them in my evening and having my time spent with my family.
It was easy for me to feel guilty or like I was missing out on time or experiences with my family. So if you struggle with this too here are some ideas on how to include different activities in to your evening.
Recharging
Take the time to learn what recharges you best. It may be spending time with your family or it could be true alone time. If it’s alone time then look where you can best include it into your day. If it is the evening maybe look for moments where your family is doing things for themselves or on their own and take advantage of this.
For me, I know my husband will be cleaning up dinner and taking a shower at some point throughout the evening. I used to not take advantage of these times and intentionally thought that this time was my time to recharge so I wouldn’t feel like I got the alone time I needed. Now, I intentionally take a mental note that this is my time to recharge and I do what I feel like would fill my cup up best at that time.
Things like going on a walk, reading, listening to a podcast, praying. These are my go-to’s for recharging alone and I have found it very easy to fit in wherever I can. You could also fit in self-care easily during these times.
Activities
I also do the activities listed above and others in the evening alongside my family. I can often find times where we are together, but also doing our own things. Often times I would waste that time scrolling on my phone instead of doing what I needed to fill my cup. Leading me to feel like I never have time to do things for myself. When in reality I was just not taking advantage of the times I did have because it didn’t look how I envisioned it to be. I now intentionally spend that time doing the things I want to do that fuel me.
Time with family
My most important things in the evening is spending time with my family. Taking time to do so is what keeps me going. I let this want known to my family so that we could work together to best accomplish this. Each season of life this will look different. Be willing to talk about how to best do this as life circumstances change.
If it feels impossible to get this done try things like eating dinner and talking, going to do activities together like a walk, and doing things that need done together. It may look different than what you envisioned, but what is important is getting quality time in with your family. So try to think of ways you can do so in whatever way you can.
Creating your evening routine as a stay-at-home wife
Try not to overcomplicate things. Look for ways to easily include the things you want into your preexisting routine. Look at what would best fill your cup and what you want to prioritize in your evening. You may need to ask for help in making this a reality. It will take some time and some fine-tuning, but eventually, with intentionality, you will get there.
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